Jesus: the cruciFICTION

Pilate through treacherous waters

Jesus' side pierced by a spear to verify his death, fulfilling a prophesy that says "not one of his bones shall be broken"
- John 19:36,37

Jewish priests ask for leg-breaking as verification that jesus had died, which results in Pilate instructing it be done
- John l9:31

Yet Pilate was unaware of jesus' death ("he couldn't believe it").
When joseph asks for the body, Pilate sends an officer who comes back and confirms that jesus is - surprise - dead
- Mark l5:44-45

Mark 15:42 states it was evening.
This means the sabbath had already begun (the Jewish 'day' began at 6pm), when joseph asks for the body.

However, burial was not allowed on the sabbath, showing the impossibility of the tale.

Split personality?

two faces of godGod forsakes jesus
- Mark 15:34
(yes, the words indicate that jesus accused god of forsaking him, but since he is omniscient, he must be correct in his thinking that this is what actually happened)

Jesus is inseparable from god
- John 10:30, 14:10, 16:32

Paradise that day?

Jesus tells the believing robber he will be with him in paradise that day
- Luke 23:43

Jesus was in the grave following his death and did not ascend to heaven for at least one more day, though it will be claimed that he doesn't ascend for three days.
- Acts 2:24, 31, Luke 23:54, 24:1, John 20:17

For more detail on this point, see items under "Resurrect THIS"

Robber conversion?

Both robbers revile jesus
- Matt 27:44

Only one robber reviles jesus and the other believes
- Luke 23:41-43

"I'll bear your burden, brother..."

Simon of Cyrene carries jesus' cross
- Matt 27:32

Jesus carries his own cross, thank you very much
- John 19:17,18

Quick and speedy trial

Jesus' trial before the Sanhedrin was at night and in morning he was taken to Pilate
- Matt 26:57-68, 27:1-2

Both jesus' trial before the Sanhedrin and being taken to Pilate were in the morning
- Luke 22:66-71, 23:1

Peter's in denial

Peter is warned he will deny jesus after the last supper and after having left the upper room
- Matt 26:20-34, Mark 14:17-30

Peter is warned he will deny jesus during the last supper before leaving the upper room
- Luke 22:33-39, John 13:37-38, 18:1

Last meal request?

The synoptics make it clear that the last supper was the Passover meal
- Matt 26:17-21, Mark 14:16, Luke 22:13

The Passover was on the day after jesus was crucified
- John 19:31, Matt 27:62

Matthew's account contradicts itself since it has both days (supper & post crucifixion) as being the first day of passover.
Go figure

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